Dress up is for all ages

Hopefully if you are reading this you are one of my friends and you know me and know that I love dressing up.  In fact in our old house we had a whole closet dedicated to dressing up, called the dress up "Box".  Which began to overflow and became a whole room/attic/closet thing.  We have acquired many different accessories along the way, there are the always famous LANE DANCE ACADEMY costumes, with all the matching hats, feather head bands, sequin canes, sequin wristlets, etc.  Then there are the various Halloween costumes that seem to navigate their way into the dress up BOX, also there are various past sporting event outfits, old uniforms, skits from school plays, student government skits, sorority recruitment outfits etc.  Then there are the REAL clothes, that are probably the best part old prom dresses, old JORTS, old hats, clothes from when my mother was younger, now clothes from when I was a child and just all sorts of fun stuff.  The dress up BOX is one of my favorite places to visit.  Whenever you are in need of sorority mixer outfit, a themed party, a Halloween costume of just dressing up for fun, it's the best place to visit.  The inspiration for this blog came from a 1 year old birthday party I went to this weekend.  My friend Liz's twin little girls Izzie and Addie had their first birthday party this weekend and the theme was carnival.  It was soooo cute and she did a great job.  There was a photo booth set up with a dress up box, to dress up and take your picture and write a message to the birthday girls and they were going to make an album for them, what a great idea.  And guess who loved it THE ADULTS!!!!   Every time I looked over some adult was putting on those costumes it was great.  I think every party should have a photo booth or at least dressing up.  So not only is Liz the creative party planning mommy, but she also makes hair bows, cakes and other fun things for her little girls, she actually made them matching Tutu's.  I liked them so much I asked her if she would make ME one... and she said YES!!!  She is actually making us both one, which we plan on sporting this weekend at our most excellent friend Kim's 21st Birthday Party.   I mean we are getting into the last years in our 20's, why not just dress up and have the best time.  Who care what people think!!!!   So I'm always up for dressing up and going to themed parties and vow to never have another party without a theme!

I will certainly add pic's from the 1 year old b-day party and pic's from the 21st birthday celebration this weekend.  I will also add some of my favorite dress up moment's courtesy of the dress up BOX from the Royall household in Smithfield, NC and visitors are always welcome.  The only rule is, everything must be returned, I know you who are out there who still have our stuff.  Also if you just happen to have left your prom dress at my house, it has now been donated to the BOX and once it's been in the BOX, it isn't coming out...sorry.  But you are welcome to borrow it!!!   hahahaha

Skirts are not for running

On the way to work EVERYDAY I see these ladies walking/running around the neighborhood in skirts.  Yes skirts!  I believe they are what normal people would call tennis skirts.... hence the word TENNIS, to be worn while playing tennis.  They are not running skirting, exercising skirts, walking skirts..etc.  I mean who wants to walk in a skirt anyway.  Don't your legs rub together, don't your legs sweat, don't you get SWAMP ASS!  GR--OSS    So it makes me ponder why do they wear these skirts to walk.  Because they are pretty, they want to look sexy, they want to look girly, they want to pick on men on their morning strolls???  I mean if you have really skinny legs then just wear shorts, if your legs are skinny then they don't rub together, your shorts don't ride up and you could even wear those really tight biker shorts and not look like the Say Yes to the Dress Big Bliss brides who stuff themselves into a MERMAID dress (TOTALLY another topic and one of my fav shows).  People wear them for tennis because it provides flexibility on the court that shorts do not.  You are not doing such strenuous running that you need all that flexibility, plus I don't want to see your crotch or butt hanging out on my drive to and from work.  Keep it covered ladies.  So just be normal and wear shorts to exercise like every other normal person on the planet.  I mean your rich hot husband is already at home waiting for you, so stop trying to show off and steal other people's men.


Here are some examples of what I don't want to see... especially your CROTCH.

Always a Bridesmaid....

No this is not 27 Dresses, Something Borrowed, Bridesmaids, My Best Friends wedding, but it is my life.  I love weddings, they are soooo fun to go to, to be a part of, and NOT the bridezilla kind.  I've only encountered one of those and she will remain nameless since lots of my friends read this and I would like to keep them as my friends.  So this wedding season I'm proud to say I currently only have two weddings on the books, neither of which I'm in.  WOW  I believe the record one year is close to 12 weddings, I had four weddings in 2 weekends one year...and no I did not pull a 27 dresses and go to all four, only because I was in one of them and I'm not as cool calm and collected as Katherine Heigl and one was in Wrightsville Beach, while the other in Pinehurst, little bit of a hall.  So I'm really excited that there is only two this year, one was in May and I already missed it, the other in October (YEAH CHRIS AND AMBER) and there is a recent engagement, that will sure bring lots of fun festivities to my life.  But the point of this blog is to say I have two girls that are getting married at work and we talk about favors, bridesmaids dresses, colors, decorations and things daily, so I sure feel a part of their celebrations even though I'm not invited.  Well one is in NYC (and I can't possibly party down with all Yanks for a whole evening) and the other is smaller with family and close friends.  But I did however get to go try on bridesmaid dresses today.  My fav Yank bride's bridesmaids are all in NY, so I agreed to help, it was fun and the dress was way better than it looked on-line and sorry friends, but way better than some of the dresses I have worn in the past.  With that said to all the future brides out there, YES it is your wedding, and YES you've been waiting for like your whole life to choose dresses you think your friends will like (aka not look better than you in) ,YES you have the final say, but PLEASE think about those busty, big bellied, big hips, 12 year old boy body, bridesmaids that you have and think what MIGHT actually look good on them.  I advise you to try the dress on yourself and see how it feels.  Just throwing advice out there.
Also I LOVE helping my friends with their weddings, advice, engagement parties, setting up, not so much on the cleaning up, bachelorette parties...etc but all the FREE help STOPS NOW!!!  See these days I'm just struggling with things and I think know how can I make more money... the answer is not work more because I pretty much work all the time.... the answer is CHARGE my friends for all this awesome free advice!!!  Yes I know, I would be a great wedding planner, great wedding director, invitation writer, song writer, matchmaker, bikini model.....haha  Sooo now let's turn those dreams into realities and start making some MULAH!  I mean if you want me to make an appearance at your bachelorette party and provide all this FREE entertainment, I mean comedians get paid, so just fork over the dough for my plane ticket and I'm there and I'll keep the party rolling all day. 
I need to write a book, BRIDESMAID ON A BUDGET.... wow that kinda has a nice ring to it...ok Jane Royall the writer in the family get on that.  Or we could just add that chapter to our book.
But I love all my friends weddings past, present and future and I will always be there with my honest opinion and hopefully you don't kick me out of your wedding like those girls on Bridezillas.  And we'll have lots of fun wedding stories to tell, some that will NEVER leave me.... just please don't repeat at my wedding (if it ever happens) because there will be GRANDPARENTS there.

So here's to my friends, who have all tied the knot
You're weddings were all beautiful, some a little too HOT 
But I drank lots of beer and lots of wine
Put my dancing shoes on and had the best time
I'm ready for another round in the next couple of years
That will bring more laughs and I'm sure some tears
So to all the boys out there, save your up money
So I can hook you up with one of my honey's
Then you pop with question and it starts again
Weddings are the best place to meet MEN!

Big Rock, Big...... FAKE BOOBS

Ok so I went to the little event this weekend called the Captains Party, it's a kick off for the biggest fishing tournament on the east coast.  The only sporting event in the nation to offer a bigger pay out is the US Open...WOW And yes folks it's right here on the coast of NC, in good old Morehead City.  If you have never been should take a weekend and go down to the tournament.  The first weekend is the kick off, with the lady anglers party, where ladies dress up in outfits (which we love to do) and try to win prizes and drink wine, but not too much because the ladies will be up fishing on Saturday around 6am.  Saturday night is the captains party where all the captains get together and go over all the rules, followed by the best party ever with a great band, open liquor bar and tons of food and of course FAKE BOOBS!!!  I swear I have never seen so many fake boobs in one place...WOW!  There was no escaping them, they were hanging out, peaking out, popping out and just plain OUT!  Ladies knew what they were going for, they were setting themselves up to receive a chunk of that 2nd largest sporting event payout.
But anyways for real it's tons of fun and they raise a lot of money for charity. They fish all week M-S and bring lots of big fish and fun fishes to the scales.  There are vendors and it's just really cool to see.

If you want to check out some of the pic's from the lady angler event where they are dressed up silly visit the link below and vote for the Leopard Ladies... those are my girls
http://www.thebigrock.com/lady-angler-best-dressed-contest

More info on the tournament in general
http://www.thebigrock.com/

Pic's of the big fishes
http://www.thebigrock.com/billfish_gallery
Already a 652 lb fish that was brought in on Monday, if no one beats that, could be like an $800,000 fish right there or something like that. And that fish was caught by a boy from JOHNSTON COUNTY, who also went to Carolina! And there is already the $250,000 plus fish that was weighted in, the first Blue Marlin over 500lbs brought to scales automatically wins that.  The final fishing day is Saturday and they have an awards banquet that night, and hopefully the Leopard Ladies will take home the best dressed prize and maybe some of our fishing friends on the Megabyte, Safari, Reel Jim, Big Hunter, Pelagic, Chainlink, Double 07, or Pig Rig will bring home the money maker!

So anyway lots of fun things about the tournament.  If you are in the area should head down to the scales one afternoon and watch them weigh all the fish, it's really exciting.

I'll leave you with a few pic's of the FAKE Boobs from the captains party.. if you wanna see more
http://www.thebigrock.com/rockn-shots

WOW-sorry if you know her

Here is some more

I just liked the Ice Sculpture

Major Hookers Right Here

More Sluts I saw at the Party...haha

And I just had to add this outfit

Road Rage

So it's been a while, been a busy week.  I worked so much this week, they just told me I was over hours and to leave early today.  Wow to leave early on a Friday is my dream.  But I'm sure only to encounter everyone else on the planet leaving work and heading east for the weekend, I mean with this weather how could I resist.  But my beef this week is with hoity toity luxury full-size sedan drivers.  I mean just because your cost more than mine doesn't mean you get to pull out whenever and where ever you want to in front of me and expect me to stop.  And yeah I have seen Fried Green Tomatoes, and I know you are older and have more INSURANCE, but FOR REALS!!!  I need to keep this poor little fender I have, my brakes squeaking and barely working... that's how I get buy with this mid-size SUV, that I say I need for room, but really just like because it's fun to run over curbs which I often do.  Hence why I'm always needing new tires, but I would really like to blame this on all the brakes I've had to slam stopping for these rich people who have no re guard for others.  Ok yes you have a nice car and yes I can see your $1200 sunglasses resting on your nose job and botox, which I'm sure would not look all that great if we got into an accident.  If the car didn't injure you I'm sure I could give your plastic surgeon another surgery to work with.  Anyways so watch where the heck you are going unless you are dumping $100 bills out of your window as you pass by, which I would GLADLY slam on brakes and stop and pick up.  Which you would think I could then fix my squealing breaks, broken window (of 3 years), new tires, inspection that is due, but I would most likely go buy a new bathing suit or maybe fill up my tank for a little East Bound trip.  So for this weekend I beg you rich people to watch your ways and I'll try not and cuss you up and down the road and for goodness sakes....JUST MOVE OVER TO THE RIGHT LANE, if someone is riding your ass!!!!!  I've got places to go and people to see!

Hangover II

So Saturday am, after a night of Miranda Lambert, booty shaking at Shitty Limits and a pit stop at the Point, I had to go to work in Urgent Care...booo  Hello people it's beautiful outside and like perfect weather and yet again you are in here bothering me with your stupid problems and your $75 copays and I'm a bit tired.  I made a little stop at Biscuttville...yummy smoked sausage with CHEESE and a Large Diet coke, yes I'm one of those people I will super size the hell out of something and still order a Diet Coke.  I mean what I just like Diet Coke and every little cut back helps.  Anyway, after dealing with all these dumb sick people I finally got out of work for a Saturday afternoon date with my dad.  Movie choice, HANGOVER II.  We both wanted to see it, so why not, we saw the first one together, can't be worse than that.  I have a really cool dad, but even with a really cool dad an Asian Stripper/prostitute with a penis is REALLY not funny.  This movie just took it a little far.  Then I started thinking about my guy friends and the guys that I know and if I think things that happened in the Hangover would happen to any of them???  Also my dad used to be one of those crazy guys too, maybe it happened to him and his friends??  Plus he always says all the things that happened in the movie Animal House, most definitely all happened over his four years at the Phi Gam house.  So I think the answer is YES.  Also I can recall some brief recaps of bachelor parties involving strippers, lost groomsmen, flying hot dogs, back rooms, flips off balconies, jail time, broken limbs, and broken items in general.  These are just the things that us girls have heard about, I can only imagine the untold stories.   And I've come to the conclusion that yes all of the incidents for sure could have happened to all of my guys friends, just maybe not on one trip.  So girls, the lovely franchise of The Hangover has provided us a glimpse into past lives of your/our future husbands, because atleaset one of his friends is the "Allen" and one is for sure the "Phil".  But if his friends look like Phil aka Bradley Cooper I would be OK with that any day, as long as he took his shirt off around me, let's say like once a week.  So go see the movie, but NOT with your dad and just think about all the dirty things your husband did before he was your husband ;)  And go to Mission Valley theather, they have the best popcorn and they SELL BEER!!!!!!! HAHA

Promo Pic for Hangover II

Stu, Hangover II

Holy COW!!!!!!!!!  WOW

Definition of Beefcake and yes I will have that for Breakfast.

Miranda Miranda Miranda

So I went to Miranda Lambert Concert last night with some girl friends and it was awesome!!!  Yep free tickets I won on the radio, went to pick them up and got two more free tickets!!!!  She puts on a great show.  We had a little tailgate at my house with curly fries and chicken tenders, a girls gotta eat.  And a little spinach dip for Laura since she's not down with the chicken.  Maybe a few brews, some colorful coozies, cowboy boots and we were ready for a stomping good time.  Hung out in the parking lot with some lovely ladies before the concert, who need to know what the word BRA means, but they were nice and should lay off the brews and chicken tenders for SURE.  Then got a "walking beer" for the LONG, short trek across the street to the entrance.  "Walking beer", kinda like "shower beer", keeps you motivated during setting changes.  First stop BATHROOM!!!  And why is the line always ridiculous for the ladies, but we did learn that the line we were standing in only had 4 stalls, while another bathroom across the way had like a gagillion stalls...so we made moves.  Where of course I stumbled into people from the high school it was a good little bathroom line chat, then heard "Hey aren't you Julia's sister, where is that Biotch?"  Can't go anywhere without that sentence coming out and I thought I was the one sister who knew everyone, can't help it my sister is rockstar. So while standing in line I can't help but notice some outfits, or lack there of outfits.  I mean do people not have friends??? Where is the show WHAT NOT TO WEAR when you need Stacey.  I saw this one girl with a tube top, short skirt and boots, but she was like 6 feet tall, LESS is MORE in this case...you already got more, MORE LEGS...so don't show so much on the top.  There there were some shirts with tassels, probably homemade, I'm just guessing on that one b/c if they sell that shit in a store, someone should be shot.  Then there are always the concert T's.... don't get me wrong I love a good concert T, but when you weigh three hundred pounds and the words Gunpowder and Lead stretched across your chest and you can barely read them, NOPE :( FAIL :(  I know I don't have the skinniest legs ever, but hey I'm athletic and think they are pretty nice, but really if you are fat and have fat nasty cellulite legs you should not wear boots..PERIOD.  These were not even cowboy boots, I'm not even sure what they were, like Timberland boots made a baby with cowboy boots...timberboy or cowland boots...yeah that's what you looked like COWLAND!!!  And yes I did see your spanks or biker shorts or whatever was under your skirt to keep your legs from starting a fire down there.  Ok i'm being a little harsh on bigger people, but really they aren't the only problem.  I mean bermuda shorts with boots, mini skirts with tube tops, JORTS with the pockets hanging out... a jean dress/jumper thing, unbuttoned with a neon yellow tank hanging out and I MEAN HANGING OUT...wowza.  So my fav outfit had to be the little 10 year old girls sitting behind us and basically with us by the end of the night because of course I made friends with them.  This little girl had on jean shorts, and yes the pockets were hanging out of the bottom, but the pockets were SEQUINS!!!  I thought that was sooo cool and she had a shirt with matching sequins.  I really wanted to ask her where she got them but then I figured they don't have my size at Limited too or Justice, so I'll just have to bedazzle my own jorts for future outings.  BTW the parents said it was really nice of us to ask the little girls to be on our blanket with us so they could see better.  I said the only rule is you have to DANCE....and DANCE we did!!!   Holla to my back-up dancers at the Miranda Lambert concert.  And to my booty shakers and movers at Shitty Limits, yes we did go there!!  And met a guy who looked like Leonardo DiCaprio, when he was dead and wet and another guy who looked the the Itsy Bitsy Spider....hahaha.

Laura, Amanda, Me and Lindsay!

Well have a good weekend folks.  I need to be a better picture taker of all these outfits I see, but here are some of MY GIRLS!!!

Me, Laura and Amanda

No this is not one of the 10 year olds, it's Lindsay

Chicken Wings!!!

These boots were made for walking

And yes that is Shitty Limits!

Bling Bling

I can't let the topic of Kim Kardashian's ring just pass this blog by.  I mean HOLY CRAP.  20.5 carat diamond ring that just shouldn't be allowed.  And sorry for all the fellas out there on the verge of engagement the stakes are only getting BIGGER.  So guys if you have that special someone you better go ahead and pop the question, because even if she's no Kim K, she is thinking bigger by the moment.  And also if all her friends are getting engaged she's thinking about only a ring that is bigger than all her friends as well.  I do have a guy friend with a theory, she gets something simple for her first engagement ring maybe in the 1-2 carat range and if after 5 years she is still behaving herself she can have an upgrade!  Yeah right, if you want her to have your stupid children you go big or go home.  Now I have seen this happen before, but it's not about behavior it more about when someone starts making more money and they want to make a statement.  So tell me how Kris Humphrey's (kim k's fiance) who probably doesn't even have a NBA contract worth 2 million a year splurges on a 2 mil engagement ring, did he finance that thing???  And what happens if it goes missing, does he have insurance and buy another one.  The biggest ring I have ever seen in person would be 10 carats total...wowza it was huge almost didn't look real.  Then I heard the question are you going to get a copy made???  And keep the real one in your safe?????   A COPY you're telling me you spent all that money on a ring, just to have it put in your safe so you can wear a copy, WHERE THE HECK DO I SIGN UP FOR COPY!!!  For reals all you have do is get copy of ring that seems like you could afford and just say the real one is in the safe....  HAHA  See guys I just saved you sooooooo much money, so get out there and get that copy made and make your women happy.

Her ring is not that pretty, BTW.  I mean would have a lot nicer ring if I spent 2 mil.  Which I would never do, all the things I could do with 2 mil????

So guys the moral of the story is this, if your girl doesn't look like Kim Kardashian then don't worry about how big the ring is.  She will love it if she loves you.  Especially if you have a good story to go with it, family ring, great proposal story.  But you should invest in her thoughts and what she likes just to help you out.  And I know there are so many guys out there reading this blog (NOT) and I am helping feed children in Africa with this knowledge.  Just the thoughts for the day.

Old songs

Old songs, how much fun it is to listen to them.  I love a little mustang sally and Boggie Shoes, just makes me wanna get up and dance.  Too bad guys our age don't like to get up and dance.  So you wonder why girls hit on old men two reasons.  1-so they buy us drink b/c they don't care and don't act like total douchbags and that it's such an inconvience to purchase a drink for a girl and 2. because they can dance and will get up and don't care what other people think about them.  So listen up dudes out there if you wanna chat with a girl, sleep with a girl, hanging out with a girl, it always helps to buy her a drink.  If you are ugly, she'll still accept a drink because maybe that will make you look better, if you are boring it will help her drown you out and she can think about what she is going to wear to work tomorrow and eat for lunch, if she already thinks you are cute and wants to make out, then it will help her relax and be the awesome person that she already thinks she is and drown out her thoughts of why no hotties are talking to her.  So guys of america whether your intent is to meet a nice young lady, just have a good time and dance the night away or just wanna hottie to snuggle up with later, BUY HER A DRINK!  What's $5 in the name of love.